Review - COMMUNITY 4.04: 'Alternative History of the German Invasion'

The fourth episode of this fourth season, which I believe was actually shot as the second episode, is perhaps the most classic feeling one of this Dan-Harmon-less season. Does that make it good? Read on.

There have been some complaints by our dear readers that my grades and comments related to this season have been unfair. These people feel I've given Dan Harmon too much credit and that he was at the helm for bad episodes in the past. Episodes that these people claim are worse than any of the first few of this season.

Let me address those comments in this review.

NUTS!

Dan Harmon is the GOD of the COMMUNITY universe. He created it and put himself into every episode (and by that I mean he didn't just let writers have their way with a single episode). With his departure, the new show runners, no matter their qualifications or talent, are at best demigods of that universe. And up to this point, they've helped deliver what amounts to mediocre/bad fan-fiction.

If you think any season 4 episode has been as good or even better than ANY season 1, 2, or 3 episode of the series, then that's your problem. We have totally different perspectives on quality. I'm not suggesting mine is more accurate than yours. My perspective is the one that comes from this mind, this soul, and expressed via these fingers right here (I'm holding them up for you). You don't have to like it. In the same way I didn't like the first three episodes of this season.

That brings us to the fourth episode which I previously mentioned was shot second (as far as I know).  And that's what is very strange about it. Because I'd have thought it was shot much later in the process, after the writers and actors had worked out all the kinks.

This time most things feel very familiar. Comfortable.  That's not to say the episode stands out as one of the best, but at least it can sit alongside those Harmon-era episodes that felt unusually below average.  We get the return of the Germans, Chang (and his Changnesia),  and geek-centric dialogue that doesn't feel (too) forced.

When the Germans figure out a way to take the study-room away from the group, our heroes suffer the consequences until they figure out a way to take it back (if god was still running this show, I'd detail that for you, but I don't make that much of an effort for demigods).  Unfortunately for the gang, the Germans make themselves the victim and rally people to a protest the study group.  And hilarity ensues. Followed by a message delivered by Hitler-Jeff.

This isn't an epic episode but it does have fun dialogue that works with our characters. It succeeds on a most basic level, never achieving greatness but works because of familiarity. This is one of those cases where if Harmon was still running the show, it would earn a much worse score. But because these try-hards are behind it, I'm actually inclined to praise them for it.

QUOTABLES

Reinholt: Don't worry. If there's one thing Germans don't do it's hold a grudge.
Abed: Unless we're talking about DIE HARD 3.
Jeff: Or the 20th century.

When the Dean reacts to the return of Chang, off in a different part of the school...
Abed: I just felt a strange disturbance.
Britta: Did you have dairy this morning?
Abed: Could be that. Or it could be that great evil's nearby. I'll take a provisional lactate.

Troy: I don't understand any of these puns. I think I need to learn history. 

After Jeff gives a long speech...
Abed: You had me at 'ruse'.
Jeff: That was the last thing I said.
Abed: Good thing you said it.

And some other stuff. I'm super lazy tonight.


If I had to rate this episode, and I don't mind doing so, I'd give it:

81 out of 100

Though, after I subtract 50 Dan-Harmon-is-god points, the score is a 31 out of 100. So a failure. Sorry, I didn't make up that rule.

(so I made up that rule)
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Review - WHITE COLLAR 4.15: 'The Original'

Coupled with last week's absolute clunker, this has quite possibly been the worst two-episode stretch in four years of 'White Collar'. This week's installment wasn't horrifically bad or anything, but for a few moments there I was in danger of falling asleep out of pure boredom.

At least it gave me 40 minutes to catch up on Twitter, so that was a plus.

Wow, a case involving Neal producing a forgery to catch the bad guy!? We've never seen that before! Except for the other five or six times that we have, that is.

Wow, Neal lying and being deceptive to Peter about something on the side!? Who could've seen that coming?

 Wow, Neal being caught by his mark, but still figuring out a way to get the evidence they needed to close the case!? Shocking!

Instead of writing all this, I should have just saved some time and picked a random review I wrote a few months back and copied and pasted it. I hardly doubt anyone would have noticed.

As for the new boss, Amanda Calloway, it was abundantly clear from the beginning she was going to be in Senator Pratt's pocket. It was Pratt who got Hughes fired in the first place, OF COURSE he had a hand in who replaced him. How Neal and Peter didn't assume this is beyond me.

Even though it's never been this show's strong-suit, I've somehow always cared about the season-long arcs. I'd get excited when we'd get little bits and pieces of new info each week, but at this point I don't give a crap about his dad or what's in that damn evidence box. Whatever.

The only thing that saved this episode from being another disaster was Mozzie's always delightful presence and the good scenes between Neal and Sam.

Somehow I had NO IDEA that this was the season's penultimate episode until I saw next week's preview. That makes this week's episode even worse.

Please don't suck, season finale.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--NEAL: "Mozzie has a permit."
--PETER: "I'm sure."

--PETER: "I guess that answers the age-old question of nature vs. nurture."

--NEAL: "Little pinky-swear action?"

--SAM: "Mozzie calls it mint chocolate tracking chip."

--NEAL: "He's been more of a father to me than you ever were."

--NEAL: "You asked me why I don't have original art. I've had three different names and a dozen different aliases because of you. And to be an artist, you have to know who you are."
--SAM: "You're my son, and I'm very proud of that."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--When nude models are around, Neal causes them to smile and Peter trips over furniture. Appropriate.

--If you want to learn more about Chicken-Sexing (and I don't know how you WOULDN'T), check it out on Wikipedia.

THE GRADE: D+

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Furycast 68 - Sad Birthday Boy

 
In this SUPER FAST AND SHORT episode, VladyGG and HGF discuss the new podcast format; HGF's birthday; Armed Assault 3; HGF's mom's birthday; Star Wars rumors; Metallica and Orion 2; the Oscars, Seth McFucklame, and Cuntgate; and Community without Dan Harmon.

All topics and times noted below.

PRESS PLAY to listen.


You can also RIGHT CLICK HERE and then choose to SAVE the mp3 file to your hard drive so you can listen later.

00:00 Intro - Metallica "Blackened" (...And Moderus For All version)

00:24 Opening - Explanation of the new podcast format.

02:06 HGF's crappy birthday and total lack of donations.

02:43 Armed Assault 3 Alpha release date announced.

03:36 My mom's birthday!

04:20 Star Wars rumors.

05:40 Metallica Orion Music & More 2 info, James going fuckcrazy, and Death goes stupid.

07:37 Oscars - Seth Mcfucklame, Jennifer Lawrence falling, and Cuntgate.

10:05 COMMUNITY sucks without Dan Harmon.

10:28 Ending - Goodbyes

10:40 Outro - Metallica "That Was Just Your Life" (Moderus III.2 version)
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Review - CASTLE 5.16: 'Hunt'

Props to 'Castle'.

It's not easy to deliver a great episode during "sweeps". The networks resort to "stunt-casting", spend a ton of money promoting the special episodes and shoot for the moon plot-wise with them -- resulting in unrealistic expectations for viewers. So it's easy to let them down, especially in a two-part episode like this.

Part 1 was good and left people excited for the conclusion and I don't think that anyone left disappointed with Installment #2.

While the majority of the episode left Beckett, Esposito, Ryan and Captain Gates on the sidelines (fairly surprisingly but understandably), we at least got some good dialogue from our friends at the precinct and yet another great scene from Beckett getting angry and physical in the interrogation room.

As sweet as that was, I'm sure the majority of you want to talk about the big reveal of who Castle's father really is and how Alexis was the target all along. The second James Brolin's character appeared on screen, I had already known that he was NOT "Jackson Hunt". (God damn interwebs always spoil the good stuff.) But for those of you who didn't know, that moment when he tells Castle that he's his father must have been pretty damn awesome..

Castle's dad provided some great moments: the reveal of his identity, the skeet-shooting of Castle's phone, the heart-felt conversations with Richard and the bad-ass plan he devised to get Alexis and Castle back to safety. Loved it all.

HOWEVER, as much as I enjoyed that plan and liked the execution of it, I can't help but think the episode would have been better and far more powerful if Mr. Castle had gone in there and taken a bullet to the head in exchange for Alexis as the kidnapper had asked. It would have been a noble sacrifice from a father who owed it to Richard, while also serving as a heartbreaking moment. It would have been great TV.

But they did the expected and cliche happy ending instead, which allows for James Brolin to return and re-visit his relationship to Richard. They clearly have more stories to tell there, so I understand why they did what they did.

"Hunt" had all the drama, all the emotion and all the "wow" moments you want from episodes like this. If you felt differently, let me know why in the comments.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--MARTHA: "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
--CASTLE: "Getting my daughter back."

--RYAN: "What, so he's Liam Neeson now?"
--ESPOSITO: "Neeson? The dude is barely Ashley Judd."

--BECKETT: "Look, he's acting like a father and I have to act like a cop."

--BECKETT: "My partner's daughter is missing and YOU ... are in my way."

--CASTLE: "My daughter, my money -- I'm coming."

--JACQUE HENRI: "I value my life more than my word. If I had known who was really holding your daughter, who your daughter REALLY is, I would have NEVER TAKEN THE JOB."

--JACKSON HUNT: "Given how you feel so bad about your 200-buck phone, you might want to pick up that $3 million dollar briefcase."

--CASTLE: "Sounds made up."
--JACKSON: "It is."

--PAPA CASTLE: "Because she's my granddaughter. Richard, I'm your father."

--PAPA CASTLE: "What do you say, kid? You've been playing cop for years, you ready to play spy?"

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--"He's expensive." Why did that guy bother saying that to Castle? He's rich. Clearly he can afford any price and would clearly be willing to pay it.

--OF COURSE the one picture of the dead guy with a bullet in his head lands perfectly next to, and facing, his girlfriend in the interrogation room. How many throws of that folder would it take for that to actually happen?

--Is the same person in Hollywood used as the Police sketch-artist in all the shows? I need to know this.

--It drives me crazy when the main character of a TV show is one second away from dying and someone saves them. It's ALWAYS one second. It's more dramatic that way, you say? My counter to that: it's not dramatic when you know what's going to happen and the exact second that it's going to happen. Counter that, bitch!

--I know you were literally a second away from dying and all, but how could you forget about your briefcase with $3 million in it? Amateur.

--It was obvious that Jacque was going to back-stab Castle, but I still loved him. He was a bad-ass. 

--I came close to crying two different times. Now I'm a wuss, so that's not a surprise. But still means the episode did something right.

--Everyone's father is a spy except for mine.

--The on-location filming was solid. Always nice to see.

--VOLKOV! Really!? That villain name has been taken by a far superior show, dammit. I don't care that they spell it differently, still copying.

THE GRADE: A

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Review - ARCHER 4.06: 'Once Bitten'

Another guest review. -- HGF

During pre-season interviews, Adam Reed emphasized that ARCHER was going to concentrate more on serialized storytelling. This season has explored Archer's mommy issues, friendships (or lack thereof), daddy issues, relationships (past and present) and his innermost fears. The previous episodes touched on these topics in a humorous and light beat fashion. This episode went deeper.

Once Bitten provided us with an emotional and in-depth analysis of Sterling Archer while paying homage to a wonderful book called The Natural which tells the story of a baseball player named Roy Hobbs. Like Hobbs, Archer lives a lonely existence where he has no friends and no one to loves him.

This season has gone to great pains to paint a picture of Archer being lost in his own inadequacies. It is easy for the show to rely on these traits as a source of humor, but when they take the time to explore what made him into the man he is today, it can be a breathtaking journey that changes everything we know.

Paralleling Roy's history with Archer's enables the show to dig deep into the psychosis of a man who is simply not just an alcoholic womanizer with mommy issues. They provide Archer with a pathos, and allow us to empathize with a man who deep down is a scared child, who craves a maternal/paternal figure who will choose him over everything and everybody.

I will never look at Archer in the same way, and I have a greater understanding of why he hates alligators.  Alligators are to Archer what baseball is to Roy Hobbes: daddy.

Excellent episode.

Grade A

Stray Observations

- So, Lana's dream is to run ISIS? Hmmm, interesting.

- The lengths this show goes to hurt Ray are becoming epic. Please keep going.

- Cyril, when are you going to not suck at this field work?

- Cheryl/Carol: way to go with the insight, even if you did not know what you were saying.

- Mallory Archer is an evil bitch, and if there is any redemption for Sterling, I hope he quits ISIS.

- Turkmenistan people are funny, with all their weird words that mean the same thing.

-- Shawn Mahone


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Review - SUITS 2.16: 'War'

People don't like change. They grow comfortable with the routine, become complacent and fear the unknown. I'm no different than these people I speak of.

Except for when it comes to TV. Because the status-quo sucks. It's cliche, it's boring and it's lazy. There would be nothing wrong if the season finale kept things the way they were -- 'Suits' would still be great for Season 3, but now it will be more exciting as changes are coming for next year.

If you like those changes, then great, and if for whatever reason you don't, there will still be aspects of the show you love and debating/complaining about the things you don't is half the fun of TV in the first place.

Heading into the Season 2 finale, I'm sure you expected some change anyway. Anyone could see the Mike-Rachel stuff from 10 miles away and the merger doesn't really change anything, it just adds some new faces to the firm. And I don't see how that could possibly be a bad thing. It gives the show some more versatility.

And whether you are a Rachel-Mike 'shipper or not (I am not personally: one of the very few times in my life I haven't been sucked into being a 'shipper), at the very least you can now look forward to some more racy sex scenes. YIKES. That was for mature audiences, only.

Two complaints with the Rachel-Mike storyline, other than it being incredibly transparent and obvious: (1) 
Why do big fights often result in sex for everyone but me? (2) I'm not sure I totally bought Rachel figuring out that something was off with Mike, it seemed like she jumped to that conclusion from seemingly nowhere. She was quibbling/focusing over minor things (like Mike being "cagey"), when other bigger issues were being overlooked. It seemed contrived and didn't feel natural, just a cheap way for her to find out his secret -- I mean, I know she's friends with Mike and all, but she should have gone to someone with more clout with this problem in the first place. She could've turned to her father or any senior partner at the firm -- they all went to Harvard, after all. I don't think I'm far off-base here, but the way things played out irked me a bit, but overall it's not a big deal.

A change I really did like was a possibly new and improved Jessica Pearson for next season. I've complained numerous times about how her character can be powerless when she shouldn't be, letting Harvey and Mike push her around and dictate everything that goes on in the firm. It's about time she exert her dominance over both of them. (Although her behavior in this episode was a bit peculiar. She was FURIOUS when Edward Darby visited with other firms as a contingency plan, so she guaranteed victory in the case over him: which would have guaranteed the end of that very same merger that she was desperate to make in the first place. Then, she sabotaged that very same victory she guaranteed. Strange.)

I'll always have complaints (I'm a little bitch), but I don't really see how any of the things that have changed heading into a new season can be construed as a bad thing for the show moving forward.

Other observations: 

(1) Rachel applying for Harvard was all a set-up for her finding out about Mike never actually attending law school there. We all knew she wasn't going to get in (because that would mean she would essentially have to leave the show), so this was all a precursor to her learning about Mike. I should have seen that as the reason this story was introduced in the first place.

(2) Harvey is so great, but I've never really cared much about his personal life for whatever reason. Maybe because it takes away from him being such a fun lawyer to watch. I've enjoyed his scenes with Scotty every time she's been on and they have a fun dynamic with/against each other, but DAMN, why was he so damn hostile towards her? Jeez.


(3) Two excellent scenes of dialogue in this episode: Donna/Harvey talking about Scotty and Jessica/Harvey going toe-to-toe.

(4) If you thought it was a bit far-fetched that Jessica would keep Mike around even after learning his secret, now you know why she did. She played that card she had on him at the perfect time. Well played, Jessica. I like when she plays hardball and exerts her strengths, proving why her name is on the door. Unfortunately those moments are not frequent enough. 

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--JESSICA: "I wouldn't need a roofie."

--RACHEL: "Harvey, you look nice."
--HARVEY: "Thank you, so do I."

--LOUIS: "What the hell are you looking at, asshole?"

--HARVEY: "I'd rather cross my own line than sign on their dotted one."

--JESSICA: 'And you'll be a winner, but not a leader -- and you won't have me."

--DONNA: "I'm so friggin tired of people asking me that and it's none of your business. ... But no."

--JESSICA: "That was about knowledge and the stakes were nothing. This is about power and the stakes are everything."

--JESSICA: "You're gonna stay here, be humble, and learn your god damn place."

--MIKE: "You don't understand what I have been through. You don't understand what I have lost, because it's everything -- everyone that I love: Trevor, my grandmother, Harvey, now probably this job. I am not ready to lose you. Not today."

--MIKE: "I never went to Harvard. I'm a fraud."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--Louis' face when Nigel kisses Donna's hand was great.

--NIGEL: "I was caressing her lovely hand with my lovely lips." My nominee for the most creepy/disgusting quote in this show's history. Who would've thought it wasn't Louis'?

--Getting rejected on an attempted fist bump? The worst.

--I call BS on Louis' bullying story. That wouldn't have stopped them from tormenting him. It would only have made things worse.

--Just when you thought Louis was beginning to make some strides towards being a better human being, he very predictably screwed over Nigel.

--We may have seen the last of Amanda Schull on 'Suits'. As my Twitter friend (@MariL520) pointed out to me, she's been cast on an upcoming pilot on USA Network.

--TV Couples I was unreasonably invested in (in order of caring): Chuck-Sarah (Chuck), Julie-Matt (Friday Night Lights), Zack-Kelly (Saved by the Bell), Shawn-Juliet (Psych), Castle-Beckett (Castle), Veronica-Logan (Veronica Mars), Neal-Alex (White Collar), Alex-Dave (Happy Endings)

--Couples I've resisted 'shipping for: Jess-Nick (New Girl), Jeff-Anybody (Community), Breanna-Arnaz (One on One)

--Couples that I used to root for, but now dislike: Leonard-Penny (Big Bang Theory), Ted-Anyone (How I Met Your Mother), Jim-Callie (The Glades)

--The Worst Couples in TV history: Brody-Carrie (Homeland), Hannah-Adam (Girls), Troy-Britta (Community)

THE GRADE: B+

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Review - COMMUNITY 4.03: 'Conventions of Space and Time'

In this episode, the gang went to an Inspector Spacetime convention, something everyone has been wanting to see for a while now.

NOT!

What we ended up with was the least interesting and most hollow episode of the series, where every character felt off and the writing was right out of one of those horrible CBS comedies.

This is not COMMUNITY. This is THE BIG 2.5 BROKE GIRLS. Except not as good. Where Annie fantasizes about being Jeff's wife (if someone would kill Dan Harmon, he could roll in his grave), Britta is some kind of ninja, Abed is some weirdly transformed version of the character he was for three seasons, and Tricia Helfer is not awesome.

Granted, the most interesting element of this episode, for a second week running, involved Shirley. Maybe we get lucky and the rest of the season focuses on her.

If I had to rate this episode, and it pains me to do it, I'd give it:

45 out of 100

Which, after subtracting 50 "Dan Harmon is God" points, makes this:

-5 out of 100

At least Alison Brie gets to be on MAD MEN. So this shouldn't ruin her career the way it would have otherwise. Her acting, and that of most of the cast, was less than paint-by-numbers. It was awkward.

If you liked this episode, then you are my enemy for life.
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Review - WHITE COLLAR 4.14: 'Shoot the Moon'

That episode was so bad, that it has inspired me to resort to a life of crime. Who wants to be my Bonnie?

Since I'm a scrawny little bitch, a complete coward and possess no useful skills whatsoever, I should probably reconsider that new career path. While I do so, let's count the ways/reasons why that episode sucked more than your lame-ass version of the Harlem Shake on YouTube.

1. Practically everyone on this show has already been kidnapped. Peter was. Elizabeth was. I didn't need to see it again. It was a bit different with them being captured together, but still. Hell, even the characters themselves even joked about this in the episode. This is only Season 4, let's enter some different terrain and not re-hash the same old tropes.

2. Could that Bonnie and Clyde duo have been any more incompetent? It took all of two minutes for Bonnie to spill past transgressions to Elizabeth. They let both Peter and Liz out of their handcuffs and GAVE ELIZABETH A KNIFE. I understand that they weren't supposed to be experienced criminals or anything, but c'mon.

3. Peter and Liz screwed up too. Mr. Burke was sloppy as hell when fumbling for the gun and getting himself caught. And they just left his badge out in the open. And Mrs. Burke, you are an idiot for putting the gun down on the table and racing after Bonnie. KEEP THE GUN! Call me crazy, but when I steal a gun from the person holding me hostage, I typically don't just set it down on the table and give someone a chance to kill me. But that's just me.

4. That was a really good speech by Peter, he should be a hostage negotiator. I'm serious. But that doesn't change the fact that that scene was incredibly lame. This episode was an abomination.

5. All Bonnie got for those crimes was PROBATION!? Are you kidding. Armed robbery. Kidnapping a fed. And probation. What. A. Joke.

The only things saving this episode from an F- was Mozzie making me laugh and Liz telling Peter that she forced Neal to lie. I'm glad that Peter knows that now.

I, however, am not glad I watched that episode.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--NEAL: "No need, I'll use the one under the fake rock in your flower bed."

--MOZZIE: "Seriously, boxed wine? We gotta get out of here."

--MOZZIE: "You know, it's not too late to hide that micro-cam."

--JONES: "Didn't you respond with a form letter?"
--NEAL: "Only after the carpel tunnel."

--SARA: "It's not like I'm running away to an island or something."

--NEAL: "I may have exaggerated a little bit, it would have turned into dust in another billion years."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--I demand more Alex Hunter. Where are you, Gloria Votsis?

--Shouldn't Bonnie and Clyde have googled Peter and Elizabeth? I know they couldn't have imagined one of them was a Fed, but still. Every time I kidnap someone, I immediately check their IDs and google it. Actually, that's not true. I use Bing.

--Holy crap, Diana's hair is crazy.

--I don't use Bing.

THE GRADE: D-

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Review - CASTLE 5.15: 'Target'

These past few weeks I've come up with a ton of different (pathetic) excuses as to why my reviews of 'Castle', 'Suits' and 'White Collar' were so brief and not as in-depth as I'm accustomed to doing.

Well, don't fret, my 'Castle' fans, because this week is going to be different.

No, this week that supreme laziness won't suffice. So this week, I actually have a good excuse for my forthcoming quick review. It's a two-parter, dammit, and the quality of it is mostly dependent on next week's conclusion. So until then, I'll give you some of my quick and initial thoughts on Part 1.

If you're the type of person that's going to complain about what Castle did to that suspect behind closed doors, stop reading immediately. And never read my reviews again. Because you are a little baby. First of all, it's a TV show. So shut up. Second, if you're child was kidnapped and their life was on the line, don't act like you wouldn't inflict a little pain on the CRIMINAL who was responsible to try to save your child's life.

For you normal people who read this, I'm sorry you had to read that last paragraph. But it's necessary, because there's always a dummy or two out there. 

OK, back to the episode itself. Two things that I really liked to see, that we really don't get to see much of: (1) Nathan Fillion getting to play a more emotional and serious side. He was great in this episode, and it was hard not to feel what his character was feeling. (2) It was also nice to see Molly C. Quinn actually get to do something. Alexis hasn't been on much this season and when she is on the show, she doesn't get anything good to play. I'm sure they'll be a lot more of her next week, which will be fun to watch. (Nice job picking that lock, Alexis. We got a Neal Caffrey protege on our hands here)


Although it was a bit predictable that Sara would be the one that made it out and Alexis would still be held hostage, it was a solid episode. I thought the ending was good (with Alexis shocked where she was and screaming on the roof) and it leaves me really pumped to see next week's episode. That's the mark of a good-two parter. Let's hope they finish strong.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--CASTLE: "Kate, they'll see."
--BECKETT: "I don't care."

--RYAN: "He's gotta be wrecked -- hell, I'm wrecked."

--CASTLE: Don't. Don't promise me you can find or unless you can do it. Because I'd never forgive you, anymore than I would forgive myself."

--BECKETT: "Do you want a coffee?"
--CASTLE: "No, thanks, my adrenaline will suffice."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--I don't care if I'm getting paid $25,000 per month to be someone's body guard ... I'm not standing in front of a speeding van any longer than I have to. What good is all that money if you're not alive to enjoy it? This is all moot, though, because at 5'11" and 140 pounds, I doubt I will be hired as a body guard anytime soon.

--I'm surprised Castle didn't IMMEDIATELY fear the worst when he first learned that Alexis was with the Sara on the night of the abduction.

THE GRADE: B+

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Review - Walking Dead 3.10: 'Home'

Things are tense following last week's events, but this episode redeems last week's slow start with some powerful character confrontations. In short, not much more happened this week; but at least I was reminded why the evolution of these characters has been worth following the past two seasons.

First off, a slight editorial note: Next week's review might be a bit shorter due to real life obligations.  I know the five of you who consistently read this are very upset.

The first confrontation is the scene between Glenn and Maggie, which was a pretty phenomenal follow up to the events of last week. It was obvious why Glenn was treating Maggie the way he was in the last episode and his reaction when he found out what had really happened was both sad and powerfully realistic. I also loved Maggie retaliating at him in a very physical way, especially since Glenn was still wearing the riot armor at the time. Overall the scene was a nice balance of imagery and impact, and it's one of those small yet powerful moments that seem to remind you why the more character-heavy episodes of this series can be worth it.

The showdown on the overpass was a pretty impressive action sequence that showed off the abilities of the Brothers Dixon when they work together, however Merle doesn't seem to have changed enough to impress Daryl. I like that Daryl's not giving in on his principles now that he's been reunited with Merle, and I liked that he was brave enough to call Merle on all his shit.  Season 2's "Chupacabra"- when Daryl hallucinated Merle after being injured in the woods- was one of my favorite episodes because it hinted at the back story of Daryl's youth and the confrontation between him and Merle was the perfect conclusion to that. Daryl comes to the realization in that moment that Merle will always look out for Merle, no matter what.

Meanwhile, Rick is on a spirit walkabout outside the prison looking for GHOST LORI! I can't even enumerate the ways in which this should have resulted in Rick being demoted as leader of the group. However, once again, in opposition to all forms of common sense no one is concerned about this. Not even Hereshel seems nearly as concerned as he should be after Rick reveals he's been wandering around the prison grounds looking for his dead wife.

The show continues to give Carol more screen time and depth which has been surprisingly nice, although sad that in this instance it had to come at the expense of Axel, who just seemed to be getting interesting. Things end on a pretty exciting note with the shootout with the Governor and the group being reunited (or newly united?) against a common enemy.

I give this one a 75 out of 100 - I may have been wooed by some of the great character moments that went down but that ending left me pretty freaking excited for next week's installment. And that's a lot more than could be said of how I felt last week.

Stuff... and quotes:

-Seeing Sarah Wayne Callies (Lori) all cleaned up, was weird. It feels like no one on this show has taken a shower since the end of season 1.

- Andrea:"Milton, I want you to give me a specific answer to a specific question: Where is the Governor?"
  Milton:"On a run?"

-"You lost your hand because you're a simple-minded piece-a shit!"-Daryl

-"He's Korean!"-Daryl

-Carl has his own little kid-sized riot vest! Did I miss this at an earlier point?

-In case you somehow missed the ad AMC is now airing previous episodes of the series in black and white on Thursday nights at 8pm EST.
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Review - ARCHER 4.05: 'Viscous Coupling"

Another guest review by Shawn. I mostly agree with his assessment and overall grade. --HGF

The plot in this episode concentrated on serialized storylines ARCHER has been weaving together for 3 seasons. I did not think enough character progression occured and that left me a little disappointed. The earlier episodes explored Ron, Archer's past and resolved Rays paralysis in greater detail and originality. What came before was fresh, funny and had gravitas. This episode was too sparse for my liking and did not hit the right notes I have come to expect from this wonderful show. 

Katya is back to hoodwink Archer into returning Barry to Earth and goes about it by exploiting any unresolved feelings Archer may have had for her in the past. That she pulled this on Valentines day was a little harsh to be honest, but I guess Archer is a dick so I am not too upset.

Since Katya is obviously the new head of the KGB I do not understand her motivations, yet. Does she love Barry? Does she want to run the KGB with him? Maybe these questions will be resolved at a later date, the lack of clarification in this episode hurt her agency and the arc as a whole. Archer gets the awesome Krieger involved in fixing the space ship,  the episode then skips back and forth between Archer helping (or not) Barry (in Krieger's lab) and trying to seduce Katya (in her apartment) by convincing her that Barry is cheating on her. I must admit Krieger certainly does have a good read on Archers psyche, even Archer could not deny what he was saying was not true.

Archer 's recognition and sort of acceptance of Krieger's opinions demonstrate emotional growth for our beloved spy. Maybe Archer does want to change? He felt that it was important Lana knew of his growth in the beginning of the episode.

One storyline that I am not looking forward to is Lana and Cyril's relationship and their issues again. I know in episodes 2, 3, and 4 there were heavy clues dropped in that they would get back together, Cyril's regret and Lana's need for sex, but it is still a boring avenue for the show to explore.

We shall see the consequences of these new developments later in the season, I am hoping that we do get a kick-ass cyborg fight between Barry and Ray.

A good episode.

Grade: B

Stray observations:

- Back in the 80's my parents made the same mistake as Archer, buying a time share. So I do understand his complaints about paying those "god damn maintenance fees". To this day my parents can not for the love that is almighty get rid of that stupid time share.

- Archer stealing that random pussy's flowers and candy was great, as was the call back to "Stage Two" with him using Cyril Figgis name when doing shitty things. I am glad he ran him over too.

- Carol/Cheryl just loves the physical abuse! I am with Archer, it really is creepy.

- Katya likes oil? Good to know for when people in the future date cyborgs.

- Those tapes Pam compiled and edited for Archer were so bad. They were so bad that I could not stop laughing the whole time Archer played them for Katya.

--Shawn Mahone
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Review - SUITS 2.15: 'Normandy'

Even though you're reading this, I still don't think you really care what I have to say about the penultimate episode of 'Suits' Season 2.

All you likely care about regarding this show is next week's finale and I don't blame you. And it better be good, because "Normandy" was a bit of a let-down and too anti-climactic for my taste.

I was pumped for an epic battle against Hardman, and for a second week in a row I was disappointed with the outcome. Hopefully next week provides the fireworks on that front, as Hardman had little up his sleeves this week to counter Jessica and Company.

I did like and appreciate Louis going to bat for Rachel, but the outcome seemed entirely too predictable to me. If she goes to Harvard, she's off the show. That wasn't going to happen. And I didn't buy that she wouldn't get in to begin with. I understand it's essentially impossible to get into Harvard, but her father is a famous lawyer and alum and we all know connections are everything. And even if she had gotten rejected, wouldn't her father have remedied that situation?

It was also a nice change-of-pace to see Jessica pull off a brilliant maneuver to screw over Hardman -- after all, her name is on the door and it was about damn time this show proved her worth. Too often it's Harvey saving the day, while Jessica watches from the sidelines. I wish they gave her more to do than just bark out orders and scold Harvey.

Jessica out-doing Harvey and Louis acting admirably on behalf of Rachel (not once, but twice) -- too different sides of those characters that were nice to see.

No new side to Mike this week, however, as once again he's at odds with a co-worker. Is there a clause in his contract with the show that he MUST be feuding with someone in every episode? If it's not Rachel, it's Harvey. If it's not them, it's Jessica. Or Louis. Or Donna. And now Katrina. I loved his character in Season 1, but feel like his storylines have taken a step back this year.

Last week I asked for a merger and it looks like I may get my wish, just not with the firm I was expecting. But if this results in Abigail Spencer becoming more of a regular character, I'm all for that.

Things I want to see in the finale next week: (1) Rachel finds out Mike's secret, slaps him and disowns him. (2) Mike gets a new love interest (Let's go with Katrina, because I want Amanda Schull to stick around and a love-hate between those two could be fun) and Rachel gets jealous. Then Mike tells her to shove it. (3) More Hardman, with a more exciting confrontation. Would love to see him win a round. (4) Harvey and Jessica have a major blow-up. (5) Louis resorts back to doing something sleazy. (6) More Donna.

What do you guys want to see?

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--DONNA: "A woman who wants nothing -- I distrust that."

--RACHEL "Mike, I am a sure thing."
--MIKE: "Yeah, you can give it a shot -- but it probably won't work." (How great was his facial reaction there?)

--JESSICA: "That reminds me, how are things going with Pussy Galore?"

--HARVEY: "I call Curley."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--Apparently Mike has a weak stomach ... I would have finished that, dammit.

--Loved how Harvey was at first reluctant to let Donna fix his hair, but then said the hell with it and let her do it.

--Hardman looked surprised/offended that his name was off the door. Did he really expect that to stay up?

THE GRADE: C+

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Review - COMMUNITY 4.02: 'Paranormal Parentage'

Written by the beautiful and talented Megan Ganz, this episode takes us into Pierce's universe, and his mansion of horror, like something right out of Scooby-Doo.

Some time ago, THE BIG BANG THEORY did an episode where one character discovers the college paper of his girlfriend and realizes it is a C- paper, so he fixes it into an A+ paper (more or less). And that's what I am beginning to see with this season of COMMUNITY. Without Dan Harmon, these writers have been delivering a lot of C- episodes, but Dan was the brilliant boyfriend who made them into A+ material.

Sure, this was an improvement over last week's but only in the characters feeling like themselves (unlike last week). Unfortunately, it's just not that funny.

Granted, the scenes with Troy and Shirley were laugh-out-loud hilarious. The funniest being when Shirley realized she was more knowledgeable about sexual deviant behavior than innocent babe-in-the-woods Troy.

There were also a few classic Jeff and Britta moments but only in setting. Execution wise there was something missing. The new EP's attempt to inject more relationship related material into the show just isn't working that well. I don't care about Jeff's dad, though Joel McHale did a fine job trying to sell Jeff's emotions. I also don't care about Pierce's daddy issues (feels old now). It all seems like things Dan Harmon would have spent less time on and more time on making the show funnier. Edgier. Cooler.

The attempts to go geek, like the map of the mansion with each member of the group identified by board player pieces felt like the fan-fiction version of something Harmon would have done better. Even Abed finding a secret observation room didn't work all that well as a classic meta-moment. It was amusing at times but, again, felt mostly like fan-fiction with Abed saying lines someone thought he would say, if that someone wasn't the person who gave that character life.

The appearance of Pierce's half-brother, Gilbert, was welcomed but then felt flat at the end like any plot point in a show like HAPPY ENDINGS (from where these show runners came). I am starting to see a lot of similarities between this season and HAPPY ENDINGS in general actually. I like that show. I sometimes love that show. But I never care about the plot. I usually have to be reminded of whatever happened in each episode after watching them. There is a reason why HAPPY ENDINGS doesn't have a convention. Or crazed fans following their show runner around the country.

It's funny. It's just not epic funny. Or epic. At all.

If I had to rate this episode, and since Dan Harmon is a god, I'd give it:

72 - (50 Harmon boyfriend points) 
= 22 out of 100

If even Megan Ganz can't make this show work like it did a year ago, then we may be in trouble. And yes, this week's score is lower than last week's even though I said I liked it more. That's because last week I should have given the episode a 66 (-50) = 16. I do appreciate that the actors are still trying to give us the characters we know and love. If only the writers were as well. If only the show runners weren't making expensive fan-fiction.
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Review - CASTLE 5.14: 'Reality Star Struck'

I'm going to take a page out of the great Alan Sepinwall's playbook and do a "quick review" of this week's 'Castle'.

I'm doing this for three reasons: (1) I'm lazy. (2) Alan Sepinwall is the man and if he can do it, so can I. (3) How much is there really to say or analyze about a random episode that is essentially a filler stand-a-lone?

Is it just me or does it seem reality shows aren't just taking over TV, they are taking over our regular TV shows, too?. Seems like every procedural features a reality TV style murder episode. This one wasn't particularly noteworthy, either, featuring the lamest and worst murderer ever. She gets confronted by the cops, threatens to leave the interrogation, fumbles for her keys in her purse and when she can't find them -- she says the hell with it and confesses! What!? Pretty stupid.

It was inevitable that Laney and Esposito would get back together at some point, so I didn't really care about that storyline. Yawn. And holy crap, but they have no idea what to do with Detective Ryan anymore. That was embarrassing. I really used to like his character, but he's useless now. Kind of a shame, really.

The Castle-Beckett stuff was fine, nothing special. No way Gates would be that clueless, though. At least I don't think she would be. You guys agree or no?

One thing I really did enjoy was Beckett going crazy in the interrogation room, knocking over the table and flipping out. That was great.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--MARTHA: "Boy I wish I had these reality shows in my day: no script, over-acting, screaming at everybody -- what a gig."

--CASTLE: "I can't feel my butt."

--CASTLE: "Bob?! And Penelope!? You two are back together?! Spoiler alert."

--CASTLE: "Looks like one of us did our homework."

--BECKETT: "Now take your clothes off, put them in the drawer -- and meet me in the bed."

--CASTLE: "Seriously?"

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--I'm not going to quote it, but I enjoyed Captain Gates' rant on the reality show when Beckett and Castle are watching a clip.

--The husband of Gina Torres' character was a sad sack of shit. No way he could have pulled her.

--Sadly, I can relate to how much fun Castle and Gates were having when they were discussing and debating the happenings of the reality show. I may or may not do that with my family and 'The Bachelor'. If anyone wants to talk that show with me, message me on Twitter (EliRosenswaike). I'm not kidding about this.

THE GRADE: C-

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Guest Review ARCHER 4.04 - 'Midnight Ron'

Another review by the masked guest reviewer. I didn't read it. Let me know if there is anything wrong with it. Thanks. --HGF

As a huge fan of the 80's film Midnight Run I was always going to be in the can for this episode. Midnight Run was a film about 2 odd balls who traverse the country using different forms of transportation while eluding various criminals, police, bounty hunters, FBI, etc. What makes the film work so well is the amount of emotional truth that was mined from the pressure the 2 men found themselves under. There was comedy sure but there was also this deep psychological game being played throughout and in the end they forged a grudging respect and friendship.

Midnight Ron had a lot of these moments too and I was amazed at just how much the episode allowed to fit into 22 minutes of running time. You have the oddballs in Archer and Ron "Freaking Epic" Cadillac, you had the different forms of transportation from the cars to the Trucks to the train back to the car, you had the same argument as the film about stiffing the working man or woman...whereas in the film it was about the tips in the episode it was about not stealing the beer! You had the moment where Ron called Archer out for his weird relationship with his mother and Archer actually learning something and forging and grudging respect with Ron.

In between there was the great montage of every ISIS refusing to lend Archer money, EVEN WOODHOUSE! Who Archer basically owns! The car chase scene had some fantastic animation and voice work. I really warmed up to Ron in this episode as the car thief who was trying to do right by his old crew.

Finally I just love that there is no bounds to how much he can be an asshole to his servent Woodhouse.

Excellent episode.

Grade: A

Stray observations:

- If I were Archer and had the stunningly drawn woman in my hands I would burn my passport and never go back either!
- "Neup!"
- Archers harassment of the fellow Canadians was just perfect Archer.
- Archers rant on Chaos Theory/The Butterfly Effect had me in tears when he ended that "Supposing Rhinoceros knows English!"
- The only way that Ron and Archer could remain friends is if they piss Mallory off....classic.

--Shawn Mahone
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Review- Walking Dead 3.9: 'The Suicide King'

Walking Dead returns after winter hiatus, but not with as much bang as I was hoping. The Daryl/Merle showdown goes mostly as expected and the other survivors spend a lot of time doing nothing. More thoughts below, but as you can tell I wasn't really impressed with this episode.

Things pick up pretty much where we left off with the showdown in the arena between Daryl and Merle, and with the rescue squad waiting in the wings. Things play out as expected with Daryl and Merle staging a fake fight and then an escape, with the assistance of Rick, sharpshooter Maggie, and some smoke grenades. However, all is not well once they escape Woodbury and the group decides they don't want to take Merle back with them, and that they aren't too sure about Michonne either. My biggest problem with this episode was that it seemed to take a long time to get wherever it was going. Everything that happened up until this point wasn't anything I hadn't speculated on or thought about after the mid season finale, yet it felt like the show was giving me an inordinate amount of time to digest it. On top of this the group kept getting waylaid on their journey back to the prison to have what seemed like drawn out conversations about who should and shouldn't be in the group while standing out in the open on the highway. Notably there was a scene in which there were clearly walkers in the background in the forest, yet all three characters seemed unconcerned and or unaware that they might be attracting walkers. Other than Daryl making the ultimate, but not totally unexpected, decision to go with Merle; and Glen going nuts on the walker, the first half of the episode didn't really move things along too much.

Meanwhile back at the prison Tyrese is trying his best to convince Hershel and the others that they can coexist peacefully in cellblock paradise without getting in the way of their group, but Hershel won't make a final decision until he consults with Rick. Also, Tyrese's companions aren't convinced that they should play nice with their new cellmates, but Tyrese manages to talk them out of a prison riot/mutiny plan. Not much goes on at the prison until everyone returns and there's more tedious discussion about how to deal with the new members. The only part of this chunk of the episode I enjoyed was strangely the scene with Beth and Carol, two characters the show doesn't usually seem to focus on. I thought their conversation nicely reflected some of the issues within the group and it gave those two second tier characters some good dialogue. After confronting Tyrese, Rick declares that the Ricktatorship is not currently open to new membership, against Hershel's will. However, Rick's also been having a minor psychological breakdown for the majority of this episode and this finally culminates in perhaps the episode's greatest moment: where Rick completely loses his shit, thinking he's seeing the ghost of his dead wife hanging around the rafters of the prison. He also does so while waving his gun around which makes everyone in the group a little nervous, and seemingly makes them reconsider Rick's leadership as of late.

 Overall I wasn't too impressed with this episode. Hopefully this second half of the season is just taking its time getting started, but this one felt a bit slow in the dialogue and the action. If I had to rate it I'd give it a 60 out of 100- not enough action and too much time spent debating who gets to be part of the group.

Odds and ends:

-I didn't mention it really but the only other part of the episode I enjoyed was the downfall of Woodbury. Everyone loves to watch the suburbs burn and I liked watching the denizens of Woodbury go nuts and rebel against their absent Governor.

- Andrea is staying in Woodbury, despite now knowing that her friends are alive and well. And in opposition to anything resembling common sense she's going to continue hanging around a mentally unstable man hell bent on revenge against her aforementioned friends. I also disliked her Hallmark movie-style inspirational speech: "WE PERSEVERED!"

- Daryl's crossbow stealing move might have been the highlight of this episode.

-GHOST LORI!!!!

- Things are rough in Maggie/Glen land, but good job Maggie for being the only one in my least favorite highway debate scene to suggest that maybe they should all get back to the prison before having long, unnecessary conversations about group dynamics.

-Carl remains a bad ass


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Review - SUITS 2.14: 'He's Back'

I watched this episode on Friday, but I was multi-tasking and wasn't paying enough attention to write a thorough review. I didn't get to watch it again until Sunday night, because I was shoveling 28 inches of snow and because, quite frankly, I didn't want to watch the very same episode again.

So now that I've watched it twice in the span of a few days, I should have a ton to say about it, right? Well, maybe, but I'm just really eager to get this over with -- so I'm going to keep this short and very unsophisticated.

GENERAL THOUGHTS: Solid episode, as any featuring the fun-to-hate Daniel Hardman would be. ... I don't generally like episodes that don't have resolutions or climaxes, but the way this episode was structured was to have the real (and final?) battle between Hardman and everyone in the next episode. So that's fine. ... I think the other episodes featuring Mike/Harvey/Jessica going after Hardman were better than this one, though. ... I think a merger with Mr. Zane's firm would give this show a nice little jolt. A few more prominent characters wouldn't hurt. Speaking of which, where was Katrina? Is she going to be on more or no? I hope so.

OTHER THOUGHTS: Donna looked heartbroken when she realized Harvey was calling Jessica beautiful and not her. ... No matter your opinion of Louis (personally, I love him), you kinda had to feel bad for him in this one. Heck, even Harvey did. It was nice to see Louis confront Hardman in the elevator. ... Two major thumbs up on Donna slapping Daniel. How awesome was that? Rachel and Mike are totally going to kiss in either next week's episode or the finale. Or both. It would just be a total shock!

I told you this wouldn't be a sophisticated review.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--DANIEL: "Oh my god, did I forget to give you the subpoena?

--DONNA: "Success is the best revenge."
--LOUIS: "Bullshit. Revenge is the best revenge."

--DONNA: "You're nothing if not an asshole."

--LOUIS: "I'll  rip your smug face off your fat neck and I'll kill you."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--I enjoyed Mike and Harvey calling Hardman a "douchebag" in unison and under their breaths at the deposition, right after Harvey saying:"let's show opposing council some respect."

--Never ruin a sporting event for someone, that's just cruel. Although these days, it's impossible to avoid being spoiled by the internet, twitter, a text message, a friend or a stranger.

--Am I the only one who found it incredibly strange that Rachel told Jessica who she was when she opened the door? CLEARLY Jessica knows who she is.

--Mr. Zane is right. Offensive lines usually are packed with big white dudes while the d-line is packed with big black dudes. Had never thought of that before.

--ANYTIME you see an elevator closing on TV, it's about a 99% guarantee that someone is going to stick their hand in and enter the elevator just before it closes.

THE GRADE: B

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Review - COMMUNITY 4.01: 'History 101'

Sony fired COMMUNITY show creator/heart-and-soul Dan Harmon following the end of season 3 because he was apparently difficult to deal with and because they were convinced the vast majority of viewers wouldn't notice the change since network executives think their audiences are morons.

If you think this is the show many of us fell in love with, then the executives were right.

I have been saying for months that at best the show without Dan Harmon should be called CINACO (Community in name and characters only). I also promised to take 50 points away from any episode rating because the show minus its main voice doesn't deserve those points.

This isn't the show Dan Harmon created. This is some fan-fiction version of it.

Thing is, you can't replace the madness that was Dan Harmon's tireless drive to make something unique and edgy, though new show runners Moses Port and David Guarascio have sure tried to deliver something they think Harmon might have done. Thing is, Dan wouldn't have done this because he would have thought it wouldn't play.

And it is a shame because these actors and characters deserve better material. A better show runner.

Dan Harmon.

Dan Harmon!

Dan Effin' Harmon!

Sure, as an episode it wasn't completely terrible if one pretends the show hasn't done much better --in fact, every episode that preceded this one was superior. Yet some things worked a bit, like Abed's show-before-a-live-audience version of reality with Fred Willard as Pierce. Or the line about Taco Bell and the war on terror:

Abed: All of our wishes come true. Last year Troy wished we got Bin Laden and the Dorito taco.
Troy: Yeah but Obama got credit for both.

The meta jokes about things changing were also appropriate and did feel like something Harmon would have enjoyed using had he not watched the essence of his creation raped by marauding studio fools. And while I am not a fan of Britta and Troy's relationship, their fight and Troy's "Why does this feel good" worked.

Unfortunately, the rest didn't work as well. The whole Hunger Deans bit was a tired wannabe version of the paintball episodes with none of the effort. Annie's backtracking on her emotional growth away from Jeff made no sense. Annie and Shirley's dean punking? Weak. Plus Pierce's attempt to find a ball joke, which could have worked if used once, just withered away in the less than capable editing hands of these new pair of clown-shoes.

If I had to rate this episode, and Dan's essence says I don't, I'd give it:

   78 - (50 Harmon points)

= 28 out of 100

So far, not so good. And based on what critics who have seen followup episodes have said, this was one of the better early ones.
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Furycast 67 - The Movies of 2012 Spectacular

VladyGG and HGF discuss many things all thankfully noted below with the time of each discussion for your convenience. To sum up: Star Wars, JJ Abrams, nearly every movie we saw from 2012. In the video version there is XCOM Enemy Unknown game-play featuring characters using names of people I know or those who subscribe to my YouTube channel.

00:00 START
00:48 INTRO
06:11 Star Wars Episode VII/JJ Abrams
18:04 Movies of 2012 discussion starts
19:18 ARGO
21:36 CLOUD ATLAS
23:33 DJANGO UNCHAINED
26:02 DREDD
28:28 END OF WATCH
29:33 FLIGHT
29:43 HITCHCOCK
31:18 JOHN DIES AT THE END
33:04 KILLING THEM SOFTLY
34:56 LES MISERABLES
36:35 LIFE OF PI
39:16 LINCOLN
42:05 MOONRISE KINGDOM
44:55 SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK
47:53 THE BOURNE LEGACY
48:15 THE CABIN IN THE WOODS
50:58 THE IMPOSSIBLE
52:48 THE IMPOSTER
53:50 THE MASTER
55:50 THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER
61:31 THIS IS 40
62:35 WEST OF MEMPHIS
64:10 ZERO DARK THIRTY
71:40 End of Podcast talk
80:40 END

Press play or wait for autoplay to start below:


Or RIGHT CLICK THIS LINK and SAVE the MP3 (audio only) file to your computer.

You can also watch this video podcast on YouTube by CLICKING THIS LINK.
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Review - WHITE COLLAR 4.13: 'Empire City'

We were all bored by that episode of 'White Collar', so I won't further bore you with an in-depth review of it.

Forget the fact that "Empire City" featured quite possibly the worst case-of-the-week in the show's 59-episode history, the real crime of this episode was that any momentum the show had after last week's installment was taken away just like Baltimore's was after the blackout in the Super Bowl.

I was under the impression that this week would be centered around the mystery surrounding the key, featuring a competition for information between Peter and Neal -- with both of them doing so behind each others backs. Instead, all we got was a crappy case involving cabs and Peter simply tracking Neal's anklet. Boring.

With just a few episodes remaining in the season, 'White Collar' can't afford another boring clunker.


Luckily there was one positive from this episode: Diahann Carroll. It's always nice to see June given more screen time and it was a delight to hear her sing, showing off one of her many talents that has made her a star since she was 18. Amazingly, she's still got it 69 years later!

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--NEAL: "Moz, I'm not paying you for the ride."
--MOZZIE: "Oh, you are if we're going to Brooklyn."

--NEAL: "Can you at least turn off the meter?"

--NEAL: "Stop trying to make that a saying."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--OF COURSE Mozzie scams for information as a cabbie.

--Hal Hoover!

--Three in the hand is better than none in the bush.

--DJ Mozzie Jeff?

--Elizabeth Burke looked great in that dress at the club. Peter Burke outkicked his coverage.

--One last Tiffani Thiessen note: C'mon, Tiff, don't be such a party pooper!

THE GRADE: D

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Guest Review - ARCHER 4.03: 'Legs'

Shawn returns with another guest review of an ARCHER episode. I don't know what he's trying to say but then he's writing for free and not complaining too much when I charge him for it. --HGF

As I mentioned last week or maybe it was the premiere review...do not remember...not important...a show will at some point work its way to undo some of its previous season finale work. But as I said before most shows fuck you off when they do it because it is lazy ass fucking shit writing that pisses most of us off but with Archer it is so much fun. We knew that Ray would walk again at some point, that was a given, but the writers used what we know about Krieger and his experiments with Katya and the work they did with Barry and they made an incredibly awesome episode that allowed Ray to walk again and let the show do what it does best and that is being totally kick ass with Kenny Logans apparently coming to sing Danger Zone!

So we start off with Ray waking up and finding it incredibly difficult to get himself to work. The day to day routine of getting out of bed or making breakfast or even moving around gets to Ray as well as the mounting medical costs and all the physical shit that goes along with it. Archer parking in the disabled spot payed off the series premiere where he did the exact same thing, citing that he is a secret agent and more important (great call back show!) so that was funning.

Everything from Krieger's mouth on how he was going to allow Ray to walk again was just so hilarious. The whole scene just had me in tears and I could not stop wiping the tears of laughter from my face quick enough to keep watching. The operation itself was a mixture of disgusting and disgustingly funny (" shall I wash my hands?", "I did not?", "Where are my bears cans?", "blood pressure!", "not good!", "I am talking about his!", "so was I!") Nice touch with the classical music.

The things with Rodney were funny because he just does not shit about anything that the ISIS crew are whining about and Archer giving the guy so much shit while also blowing him and Carol/Cheryl up was pretty awesome. The call back to Archer almost blowing his ear drums again was great, Brett getting shot again! Carol/Cheryl getting turned on by physical/emotional violence was awesome too. So many awesome things going on.

The Mallory and Ron stuff was great too while also filling in on what attracts them to each other...money, racism, success, assholery, etc.

Archer asking for Cyril's clothes terminator style was awesome too.

So great episode all around, I know I maybe missed a shit load but I will commentate later this week when I have more time to fill in the gaps or you lazy bitches could make an effort!

Grade: A

Stray observations:

-"Oh Blow Me,""Why? you couldn't feel it"
- "A bag, I piss and shit in a bag too"
-"Me too!"
- "I do not mean robotics but bionics from the greek work meaning kick ass!" (Awesome)
- Krieger doing some necrophilia with Katya is so disturbing yet so funny
- Krieger not knowing the actual words of the bones
- Krieger drugging Ray before he actually agreed to do the operation
- "Like give you an erection!"
- "I am assuming you mean give me the ability to have an errection?", "That too"
- Ray acknowledging that the deep south bible bashers are anti gay and that he has his limits.

- Krieger selling the guns or fixing Conway ( he has no fucking morals )
- Krieger ready to just dump Ray in a dumpster if he kills him.
- The Warren Commission! great reference, it is the report that President Johnson commissioned to find out who assignated President Kennedy. This is apt because they had to trace the bullet trajectory like Archer does in this episode.
- Ron taking the piss out of Archer and Archer letting him get away with it.....such a mamas boy!

--Shawn Mahone
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Review - CASTLE 5.13: 'Recoil'

I'm a sucker for call-back episodes, two-parters and any installment that pushes the story forward (stand-a-lone's are not my favorite), so Monday's new 'Castle' was precisely the type of show that I was hoping for and one this show badly needed.

I liked how the episode focused on Kate protecting Bracken (a cool idea that I wouldn't have predicted) and loved how it also gave us a new case for the team to investigate -- was Bracken involved with the "suicide" of his 24-year-old staffer? But it also makes me worry: I don't want that to be the way that Bracken is taken down by Beckett and Co.

That would be a travesty, as far as this show is concerned. We spent the first 4+ years of this show wondering what happened to Beckett's mother and now that we are invested, we need the proper resolution to that storyline. He should go down for THAT crime.

While Beckett doing the right thing in the end by protecting Bracken was predictable, I did like how they showed how she struggled with the decision and having her realize she almost made a huge mistake.

I was hoping in this episode, though, that Captain Gates would find out about Bracken and be on Kate's team in trying to take him down. It did seem that Gates had a suspicion that Beckett was telling the truth in that interrogation room, though. I'm sure in the next Bracken-related episode, she'll be clued in on what's going on. I hope so.

I also wonder if the next time we see Bracken will be Kate trying to get him on murder or if Kate will be cashing in on that favor Bracken said he owed her. Maybe both.


Two complaints before I wrap this up:

(1) By now you should know how partial I am to Esposito over Ryan. So you may think what I'm about to say is biased, but it isn't: Ryan is such a killjoy. Get over your damn high-horse all the time. Cops that have a constant stick up their ass and condemn cops for not doing everything 100% by the book are annoying. I used to really like that character, but not anymore.

(2) OK, so you have a massive car bomb. You have the detonator and your target is walking towards the car with NO idea what's about to happen. HOW DO YOU MESS THAT UP?

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--BECKETT: "In my dreams, I'm the one that gets to pull the trigger. But you know what, if you're not comfortable with me leading this investigation you're more than welcome to tell everyone why."

--BECKETT: "When someone commits murder, whoever he is, Senator, I will bring him to justice -- no matter how long it takes."

--ESPOSITO: "If I'm her, I'm sitting there shuffling papers until whoever it is puts a bullet in his head."

--THERAPIST: "Maybe the right choice is the one that you can live with."

--CASTLE: "I wouldn't have done it, what she did. I would have stood and watched."

--BRACKEN: "You never know when you might need a friend."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--I want to be an extra on a TV show, discovering a dead body.

--Oh come on! Like the dead woman's sister didn't know she had a missed call on her cell phone with a voicemail. Everyone knows when they have a missed call. Why do I feel the need to complain about the little things

--I wish I wasn't following a million TV insiders on Twitter, it would have been a cool surprise that this was a Bracken-related episode.

--Swell job in not letting Bracken know Beckett was on the trail, Esposito and Ryan.

--I'm sorry, I just find it weird when a woman is referred to as "sir".

THE GRADE: B+

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Furycast 66 - That Kiss Sucked

Jess and Magnus talk about the NEW GIRL kiss that shocked the world (and disappointed one of us); also HAPPY ENDINGS and our inability to remember its storylines; the new show THE AMERICANS about KGB spies in the US in the early 80s; THE OFFICE trying to jump the shark; ARCHER still being brilliant; 30 ROCK series finale; and many other discussions involving COMMUNITY, THE WALKING DEAD, GAME OF THRONES, CHUCK and much more.

WARNING!!!!! This is an unedited podcast. If we decide to order pizza in the middle, then you will hear it.

Either autoplaying or you need to press play below.


Or you can DOWNLOAD this podcast by RIGHT CLICKING ON THIS LINK and saving the MP3 file (I recommend this).
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TWITTER IS DOWN - 5 February 2013

7:37AM EST
Up. Working. Thanks for playing along.

6:37AM EST
Some reports of intermittent service.

6:22AM EST
Back up on the east coast, USA. No ability to judge the rest of the planet's access.

5:35AM EST
Twitter seems to be experiencing prolonged downtime in certain areas. Will update as more information is known. There is no acknowledgement from Twitter officials as of yet.

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Review - SUITS 2.13: 'Zane vs. Zane'

I've been a bit down on 'Suits' these past few weeks but with just one little moment in "Zane vs. Zane", all is forgiven and I'm reminded why I love this show so much.

Because if you didn't laugh at Louis walking into his office talking into his Dictaphone while huge posters of his mug shots (with hilarious captions*) scattered the room, then obviously this isn't the right show for you and something is clearly wrong with you.

That was classic. I thought the prank war between Louis and Katrina was a bit ridiculous (would a well-known lawyer really get arrested for bringing cuticle clippers into the courthouse?), but it provided some fun moments and laughs and was capped off by the greatest thing that Donna has ever done. And that's saying something.

(*Here are the captions on the posters that I made out: "Being a Dick", "Senior Asshole", "Norma's Bitch", "Abraham Loser", "Little Bitch", "Perfectly Sculpted Cuticles" Which one was your favorite? I'm going with "Norma's Bitch")

Hell, that one scene was so god damn great, it almost made me forget about how lame and cliche the whole "Dad doesn't believe in me, Dad doesn't respect me, Dad doesn't care me" bullshit storyline that we've seen on every TV show ever. At least this one was well-done and felt a bit different than the others I've seen, but still.

As far as the case-of-the-week is concerned, it was just an excuse to (1) Bring back Daniel Hardman next week and (2) Begin the healing process between Mike and Rachel. While the latter doesn't exactly excite me, any time those two share screen-time (regardless if you want them together or not ... I don't) it generally is a good thing.

And I for one am pretty excited about the return of Daniel Hardman. Seriously, what show does rivalries better than this one? Between Travis Tanner and Daniel Hardman, I say 'Suits' does it the best. (Mike kept telling everyone that this week's case was NOT about Zane vs. Zane and it should be about their client vs. Zane. If he thought things got blurred this week, just wait until next week turns into a Pearson vs. Hardman all-out war.)

As great as it will be to see them trounce Hardman, I wouldn't mind seeing them lose this time. The "good guys" always win on law shows, so it's always predictable what will happen. I want this show to stray from that, but I won't hold my breath on that one.


One last thing about this week's case: Are companies really that fucking stupid about sexual discrimination? Judging by THIS and THIS, maybe they are. Also, did Robert Zane, this apparently brilliant attorney, really think that Harvey wasn't going to notice what that sexist company was hiding?

There will always be minor quibbles, but that was a really fun episode with a lot of great dialogue and leads us into a very promising episode next week with the return of Hardman. Can't wait.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--HARVEY: "This better not end up with you in bed with her, telling her your secret."
--MIKE: "Not a problem, we'll do it on the couch. ... Wow, that was not respectful to you, me or her."
--HARVEY: "Or her father."
--MIKE: "Or your couch."
--HARVEY: "Not my couch!"

--DONNA: "I'm remembered fondly everywhere."

--LOUIS: "You lied to me, and you know it."
--KATRINA: "Oh, yeah? Who are you gonna tell?"

--LOUIS: "General Zod was a visionary leader who was under-appreciated by his entire planet -- so of course I know who he is."

--HARVEY: "You too!? You are NOT getting my bagel."

--DONNA: "I gotta admit, you look kinda hot as a bad-boy."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--One would think that opposing lawyers should know by now not to mess with Harvey, Jessica and Mike and try to make things personal. It only fires them up. Want evidence? Just look what happened to Travis Tanner and Daniel Hardman.

--One day we're going to live in a world where our blenders don't sound louder than a nuclear missile launch. In the meantime, we can at least enjoy Louis drowning out Katrina talking with one.

--If I send you a picture of my face, will someone PLEASE photoshop me as former Presidents of the United States??

--Why do Mike and Rachel keep insisting that this case wasn't Zane vs. Zane when the episode title clearly states that it is?

--Rachel was #2 in her high school graduating class. I was 82 out of 257, I believe (may be a few spots off on that). Now that I told you mine, what was yours? Don't be a bitch, just do it.

--So Katrina (Amanda Schull) thinks she's a pretty face? Yeah, I'm going to have to agree on that one. And apparently Louis feels that same way about Gwen Stefani. Yeah, I'm going to have to agree on that one.

--Norma is legitimately the WORST secretary of all-time.





--I don't want to know why Louis is running low on socks.

THE GRADE: A-

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