06 July, 2012

Quoting WILFRED - 2.03: 'Dignity'


FX says: Wilfred's popularity makes problems for Ryan.

What happens when Ryan takes Wilfred to his job and the little rascal becomes a hit, then abuses that love and makes the meat-puppets miserable? Watch the episode to find out. This week, I'm not reviewing shit. I'm quoting it.

Wilfred: Why can't I go with you?
Ryan: I can't take a dog to the office.
Wilfred: (pointing at a cage) So you're just gonna leave me in that thing? Like some guy caged up like some animal?

Stacy: Oh my god! He's so cute!
Wilfred: (excitedly) And you, darlin', are a 9.5. Out of 20!

Wilfred: Sounds like somebody wants to see my balls.

Wilfred: Is anyone else concerned that there's a stale, half-eaten Wheat Thin under this desk?

Wilfred: This is no joke. I'm an office dog. It's my duty to entertain and amuse. And if I can't do it, they'll bring in some foosball table who can!
Ryan: Yeah. And in this economy, there's plenty of hungry young tables that'll work for nothing.
Wilfred: Suck my dick, Ryan.

Wilfred: I hereby tender my resignation as office dog.
Ryan: Well, it'll be a pretty big blow to the company. Don't forget to schedule an exit-interview with the (points) snow globe.

Wilfred: Those idiots wouldn't know adorable if it cornered them in a holding cell and raped them with a plunger handle. That reminds me, Bear? Can you pick up a plunger before our next date-night?

Wilfred: You don't fool me, Ryan. You may wear big boy pants now but underneath it all you've still got that same little boy penis.

Wilfred: What the. Are you kidding me?! 45 pages of lower-case H's! What have you been writing none of this down?! Jesus, Bear!

Wilfred: Did you see that?! Slow Piscopo stole my bit right out from under me!

Wilfred: Shouldn't you be out terrifying white-water rafters with your banjo music?!

Ricky: (seeing himself in the mirror) I look terrible!
Wilfred: Don't worry pretty boy, you still got your quick wit.

If I had to rate this episode, and toilet-time says I do, then I'd give it:

89 out of 100

I watch this show for the hilarious bits of dialogue and this one had enough of them for me to watch the episode twice. That's a good WILFRED day. From a story perspective the episode gave us a glimpse into Ryan's daddy issues, his need to stand up for himself, his nearly realized relationship with that chick from SMALLVILLE, being blackmailed into doing shit work, and utilizing blackmail for personal gain.