Jess and Nick backslide into comfortable mistakes while Cece and Schmidt try to avoid hurting his member.
When people get lonely and desperate they revert to that which once made sense, trying to extract newness from a worn-out passion. And so the emotional nuclear holocaust that is Nick finds himself back with his very own atomic bomb, Caroline.
Jess, having just ended things with Russel, finds solace in the arms and penis of Paul, the creepy crier. But when she finds out that he has a girlfriend, she finds the courage to try to ruin his life with the truth. But then proposes to her for him and they live happily ever after.
Meanwhile, Cece and Schmidt end up in an old-folks home to help his injured pine-cone from being rustled by the wind. Somehow this makes Cece feel romantic enough to tell Schmidt she wants to be his one and only forever and ever... or something.
It is interesting how quickly Cece and Schmidt have become the cute and stable relationship of the show. It is no shocker that Nick and Caroline find themselves back together, though Nick's decision to move in with her, even after watching a DVD of himself reminding him why she is the worst thing for him, feels a lot like one of those things that will get pulled back either in the finale or quickly in season 2.
Winston continues to be mostly pointless. Bring back Coach.
Cece: Is emotional intimacy turning you on?!
Nick from the Past: You wanna be a grown man who dresses like an unsponsored skateboarder?
If I had to rate this one, and Schmidt's peppy icepack says I do, then I'd give it:
81 out of 100
Schmidt's erection issue scores this one higher than it deserves. Mostly because I feel his pain. Plus, I loved Nick's video to himself. The Jess and Paul story line wasn't all that interesting, and Winston was in this episode. Coach got two mentions and that bumped this up a point or two. Maybe the show he is on will get cancelled and they can finally have Winston make it into the NBA so Coach can come back and rule this show once again.