Review - CASTLE 5.15: 'Target'

These past few weeks I've come up with a ton of different (pathetic) excuses as to why my reviews of 'Castle', 'Suits' and 'White Collar' were so brief and not as in-depth as I'm accustomed to doing.

Well, don't fret, my 'Castle' fans, because this week is going to be different.

No, this week that supreme laziness won't suffice. So this week, I actually have a good excuse for my forthcoming quick review. It's a two-parter, dammit, and the quality of it is mostly dependent on next week's conclusion. So until then, I'll give you some of my quick and initial thoughts on Part 1.

If you're the type of person that's going to complain about what Castle did to that suspect behind closed doors, stop reading immediately. And never read my reviews again. Because you are a little baby. First of all, it's a TV show. So shut up. Second, if you're child was kidnapped and their life was on the line, don't act like you wouldn't inflict a little pain on the CRIMINAL who was responsible to try to save your child's life.

For you normal people who read this, I'm sorry you had to read that last paragraph. But it's necessary, because there's always a dummy or two out there. 

OK, back to the episode itself. Two things that I really liked to see, that we really don't get to see much of: (1) Nathan Fillion getting to play a more emotional and serious side. He was great in this episode, and it was hard not to feel what his character was feeling. (2) It was also nice to see Molly C. Quinn actually get to do something. Alexis hasn't been on much this season and when she is on the show, she doesn't get anything good to play. I'm sure they'll be a lot more of her next week, which will be fun to watch. (Nice job picking that lock, Alexis. We got a Neal Caffrey protege on our hands here)


Although it was a bit predictable that Sara would be the one that made it out and Alexis would still be held hostage, it was a solid episode. I thought the ending was good (with Alexis shocked where she was and screaming on the roof) and it leaves me really pumped to see next week's episode. That's the mark of a good-two parter. Let's hope they finish strong.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--CASTLE: "Kate, they'll see."
--BECKETT: "I don't care."

--RYAN: "He's gotta be wrecked -- hell, I'm wrecked."

--CASTLE: Don't. Don't promise me you can find or unless you can do it. Because I'd never forgive you, anymore than I would forgive myself."

--BECKETT: "Do you want a coffee?"
--CASTLE: "No, thanks, my adrenaline will suffice."

RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--I don't care if I'm getting paid $25,000 per month to be someone's body guard ... I'm not standing in front of a speeding van any longer than I have to. What good is all that money if you're not alive to enjoy it? This is all moot, though, because at 5'11" and 140 pounds, I doubt I will be hired as a body guard anytime soon.

--I'm surprised Castle didn't IMMEDIATELY fear the worst when he first learned that Alexis was with the Sara on the night of the abduction.

THE GRADE: B+

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Review - CASTLE 5.12: 'Death Gone Crazy'

I'm not going to waste your time, nor mine. This episode wasn't very good, all that funny, or one that we'll remember anything about two weeks from now.

When 'Castle' strays from its quirky/fun type of episodes, it's usually a miss in my opinion. This was one of those times. I can't emphasize those last two sentences enough. The case-of-the-week, while interesting-ish, was so insanely obvious from the get-go.

We knew minutes into 'Death Gone Crazy' that Beau was trying to get serious and "legitimate" with his life and was about to get rid of the company. This immediately guaranteed that the murderer was his business partner. It's ALWAYS the business associate in a case like this. So it was completely obvious that Beau was not trying to blackmail anyone, because he was not happy with the guy that he was and looking to make a change.

Shame on you if that red herring fooled you even for a second.

Last thing: I know figuring out what to do with characters once they are in college is a common TV problem, but I was hoping for some better material for Molly C. Quinn. She's never been a hugely integral part of the show per-se, but it would be nice to see her included more and given other things to do than yet another iteration of: "I'm in college now, I need to be more on my own."

She's a nice part of the show and I just want to see her utilized more and in better ways.

QUOTES OF NOTE:

--ESPOSITO: "Dude, how's the in-breast-igation going?"
--RYAN: "And that's why you're still single."

--ESPOSITO: "Someone that sexy going to prison? That in itself is a crime."

--CASTLE: "Rampant speculation is my specialty."

--ESPOSITO: "She broke a guy's nose, you know she's gotta be freaky."

--RYAN: "I never thought I'd say this after graduating from the sixth grade, but our bra research is in."

--RYAN: "Sorry we had to cock-block you."


RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--Beau is such a sleazy name. Don't name your kid that.

--'College Guys Gone Nuts'? I wish I could un-see that.

--Do college freshmen talk so calmly and eloquently with their parent(s) when they have an argument/disagreement? I think not.

--Don't make a sex tape unless your last name ends in 'ardashian'.

--Ah, how cute. Beckett smiled at the end, realizing how great of a father Castle is. Sorry, 'Castle' writers, that's not gonna make up for the ridiculousness in episode 5.10 that Beckett will "never really know" Castle.

THE GRADE: D+

I don't like giving numerical scores. I should have switched to letter grades a long time ago. Of course, this is probably gonna be a mute moot point, because I have a weird feeling HGF is going to quell this rebellion.

The only thing saving this from being an 'F' is Esposito's infatuation/creepiness with the corporate spy.

 

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Review -- CASTLE 5.03: 'Secret's Safe with Me'

After last week's episode got HGF and some of the readers excited about 'Castle' again, I'm concerned this week's installment will have the reverse effect.

Take that back, I don't care what you people think, just that you read the review and maybe post a comment so it looks like people care what I think.

And while I didn't think there was anything terribly wrong about the episode, it didn't really generate much emotion or feelings in me to talk about here. Sure, there was a little fun and a little flirting, but there was some lame-ass shit in there that even got the pathetic-girly-sap that is yours truly, a bit annoyed.

I could have done without the Alexis storyline. How many times on how many shows do we need to see a kid go of to college a bit scared to be on their own? If I want to see that storyline and I want to see how it's done, I'm going to watch 'Parenthood', not 'Castle'. Monsters under the bed? Really? I'd rather see what she's doing ON the bed in college, than what's lurking underneath. (Hey now!)

Even as a lover of all things sappy and romantic-y, even I couldn't stomach the lame-ness of Castle and Beckett in the precinct talking about kissing while shaking hands. I think I'm going to puke now.

Last thing before I finish talking about an episode that really provided me with nothing to talk about: I predict that Esposito and/or Ryan will figure out about Castle and Beckett in the next episode.


QUOTES OF NOTE:

--CASTLE: "I'm a best-selling author, why wouldn't I have $2,000 in my pocket?"

--BECKETT: "Take your hand off your tool, Marco!"


RANDOM RAMBLINGS:

--As predictable as it was that there was something hidden in that doll all along, it led to a fun moment when Castle broke two of them in a row while whats-her-face watched in horror.

--Some bad police-work/logic skills: If that dude knew/thought that a $4 million bracelet was in the storage unit, why would he only bid up to $2,500? Methinks he would have brought a few more dollars to ensure he has enough for the winning bid.

--Memo to all criminals when confronted by police: NEVER say something like "It's an interesting theory, detective, but you can't prove any of it" or "I'd like to see you prove it." THEY ALWAYS PROVE IT. Just watch 'Murder She Wrote', dude.

--I like how Castle noted that they brought justice to their family .... umm, what family? They are all dead.

THE SCORE: 59 out of 100

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REVIEW: Castle 4.23 -- Always (season finale)

Good for you, Rick Castle, play hard to get! The four-year slow play wasn't working out so well.

The Season 4 "Castle" finale was entitled 'Always', but probably should have been named 'Always Predicatable'.

Beckett's shooter would make an appearance? No! No resolution would be made on the case and we still don't know who orchestrated it all? No way! Beckett would be seconds away from dying? What a stunner! Beckett and Castle would finally get together? Never saw that coming!!

What made last year's finale so special, in part, was because it was nothing like this. We didn't know Beckett was going to get sniped. We didn't know Castle would blurt out "I love you" and we didn't know if she heard him say it. But in this finale, we knew everything that would happen before it even happened -- and that's WITHOUT seeing any spoilers that may or may not have been out there.

Maybe it's not fair to compare this year's finale to season 3's, but that was such an intense ending that just left me saying "wow". I couldn't wait for the next season to start. There was no "wow factor" in this one and while I'm interested to see how they resolve Kate's resignation from the precinct and how they handle Beckett and Castle moving forward, I'm in no rush to fast-forward real life to the Season 5 premier.

It's not all bad. I mean, those complaints aside, this is kind of what we wanted, right? We wanted the finale to be related to Johanna's murder and Kate's shooting. We wanted drama, we wanted angst and movement on the Beckett and Castle front and we got all of that. I guess I just hoped it would have been a bit better and a lot less predictable.

I also wish they didn't pull one of the things I hate most in life: "three weeks earlier". UGH. I would very much like to know what you all think about this, whether you like when shows do this or not, but I just don't like when the dramatic moments are teased at the beginning. I feel like it takes the suspense out of a moment that is supposed to be -- wait for it -- SUSPENSEFUL! Just a lame and tired plot device. 

There's really not much else to add. Maybe the expectations were too high, because of the bar it set last year, but I was hoping for better. Now I'm hoping you will let me know what you think of the way this season ended.


NOTABLE QUOTABLES:

CASTLE: "Wow, that really is a smart phone."

BECKETT: "How the hell could you do this?"
CASTLE: "Because I love you. But you already know that, don't you? You've known for about a year."
BECKETT: "Are you kidding me? You're actually bringing this up right now? After you told me you just betrayed me.

CASTLE: "Because of everything we've been through together! Four years, I've been right here! Four years just waiting for you to open your eyes to see that I'm right here.  And that I'm more than a partner. Every morning I bring you a cup of coffee just so I can see a smile on your face because I think you're the most remarkable, maddening, challenging, frustrating person I've ever met. And I love you Kate, and if that means anything to you -- if you care about me at all, just don't do this."

CASTLE: "Yeah, you're right Kate. It's your life. You can throw it away  if you want, I'm not going to stick around and watch it. This is over, I'm done."

BECKETT: "Keep it. I resign."

CASTLE: "Beckett, what do you want?"
BECKETT: "You. ... "I'm so sorry, Castle. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

BECKETT: "He got away and I didn't care. I almost died and all I could think about was you."

BAD GUY: "I'm gonna put Beckett in the ground once and for all."


RANDOM OBSERVATIONS:

--Why do chicks only want the guy when the guy says he doesn't want the girl anymore? I need answers!

--Yup. Of course! Only a half-second away from dying and she's saved. It never fails.

--I enjoy when Castle talks about the problems he has with Alexis to Kate. Also love how it's always on a walk to the crime scene.

--Ugh. Criminals this smart aren't dumb enough to walk in front of cameras in secret hiding places.Criminal masterminds tend to cover their bases better than that.

--Ah, isn't that cute? Alexis' and Castle's storylines co-inciding. And Beckett's too!

--You did the right thing Detective Ryan! I'm proud of you!

--I feel like 50% of all shows have a roof-scene in their finale's. Anyone else notice this?

THE SCORE: 75 out of 100

Some nice scenes between Castle and Beckett, a nice little surprise with Beckett quitting and good performances by Ryan, Esposito and Alexis. But that's about it for the real positives.

And don't complain about the score. A 75/100 translates perfectly into 3/4 stars. It wasn't better than that.

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Castle 4.20 -- The Limey

Monday's 'Castle' was entitled "The Limey", but it should have been called "The Cliche".

Let me count the reasons:

1. Multiple interrupted conversations between Beckett and Castle
2. Beckett jealous of Castle with a new girl
3. Castle jealous of Beckett with the new guy
4. The good-looking foreign guy to create drama between the two leads (Cole Barker, anyone?)
5. One friend giving another a pep-talk about the will-they, won't-they romance, encouraging them to go for it. They of course realize their friend is right, but still never go through with it.
6. A cop/inspector/detective using a fake badge to infiltrate a situation. Seriously, every show does this like five times per season.
7. An episode involving the contents of a diplomatic pouch. 'White Collar' had a much better version of this type of episode.

But that last one is irrelevant, because this episode wasn't about the crime of the week. And thank goodness, because I've never been less invested or less interested in any case they've ever had on this show. No, "The Limey' was about Castle and Beckett.

A shock, I know.

And as noted above, this show just continues to be one cliche after another -- and just as predictable as always.

We're 78 installments into the show now, and just episodes away from the Season 4 finale.  So while it may be frustrating to some that this show has been stalling and stalling when it comes to Castle and Beckett -- it appears something is actually going to happen between the two before this season concludes.

When a show is based on the will-they, won't-they crap, which admittedly I kind of enjoy, it puts itself in a tough position. They can't put them together too soon because it could hurt ratings, but by doing so it often frustrates a portion of their viewers by dragging it out forever.

In general, I think they've done a good job of keeping them apart this long. They've had some good reasons to keep them apart, given us some good two-parter episodes and have also distracted us with cases involving the murder of Beckett's mother. Plus, seeing those two work cases together and flirt while doing so has its charms.

But much like in 'Chuck' Season 3, it appears now is the time to get a move on this. Something needs to give, and it better give come the finale.

NOTABLE QUOTABLES:

CASTLE: "Sometimes it's the people we think we know best that we don't know at all."

CASTLE: "Esposito, you'll be here -- dressed as a hobo."
ESPOSITO: "Question. Why does a brown man have to be a hobo?"
CASTLE: "You want the flowers?"
ESPOSITO: "Hobo it is."

CASTLE: She's fun and uncomplicated -- I think that's what my life needs right now."

RANDOM OBSERVATIONS:

--Loved the music in the opening. Next time I'm doing something bad and racing against the clock, I want that playing.

-Fun little moment when Castle covered his face, then Beckett's face and then his face again -- only to have Beckett get a look-see at the naked dude anyway.

THE SCORE: 58 out of 100

Don't give me crap about the score. You know and I know, that case was brutal and uninteresting. The Castle-Beckett stuff was contrived as always, and obviously any relationship Beckett has with that dude and Castle has with that stewardess will last one more week at the most. It was just a stupid plot device. And the conversation was interrupted AGAIN this week.

This episode was flat-out pointless.

I'm not wrong.

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