27 July, 2011

Curb Your Enthusiasm 8.03 - Palestinian Chicken

So...you would think I'd be totally bummed out watching an episode of Curb where there wasn't at least one scene with Leon walking around sportin' a doo-rag and swearing like a mother-f'in trucker. However, this episode was so rich in every single way imaginable that I didn't even realize that I had gone a full episode without hearing "you know what I'm sayin'?"

This week Curb was a doozy. Not only did it give us a quick picture of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict but it also delved deep into the Jewish identity - what does it really mean to be Jewish? Can you still consider yourself Jewish if your last orgasm can be traced back to a Palestinian shiksha? Don't ask me, cos I'm French Catholic, but according to Larry, or should I say, Leib son of Nat, the answer is yes.

Ok, with all of that out of the way, what really went down this week on The Jewish Shore ("Palestinian Chicken") ?

1. Larry and his friends have a golf tournament. The Funk hasn't been showing up to practice due to the fact that he went through a midife crisis and decided to rededicate his life to judaism, leading Larry to ask him "are you for real...when are you gonna come back down to earth?" Larry throughout the episode responds to Funk's rededication with a sort of scoff - his derision is not scornful but you can't help but notice he finds the whole transformation absurd. The moment when the Funk decides to say prayer before they eat is priceless, especially when he starts to bless the wine - LD decides to drink it before the prayer is spoken. It's one thing to make someone wait to eat his dinner, but it's another thing to make him wait before he starts hitting the liquor. In Larry's mind, not praying doesn't make you less Jewish, but praying does make your potatoes go cold.

2. Larry, son of Nat, has discovered his true vocation - as Jeff puts it, he's a "social assassin". If we've learned anything about LD over the last 8 seasons is that the man has moxy. If the man has something to say - he'll say it. So, his friend asks him to tell his wife to stop saying LOL (God Janice, even on another TV show you are capabe of annoying the crap out of people), and Sammy asks him to tell her mom to stop making that "starts off with a kiss that leads into a gasp" sound when she drinks. LD, "social assasin" handles these requests and as expected, the shit hits the fan. Sure, no one likes to be told they have an annoying habit, but what's funny is that the women both think that their husbands are behind the complaints. It's like THEY KNOW that someone is out to get them - and that someone usually shares a bed with them.

3. Finally, the best storyline in my opinion - El Abbas chicken. Larry and Jeff go try out this palestinian place that serves the best chicken ever, apparently. This chicken place becomes problematic when it decides to open another wing ('wing' - get it? Oh my, I am so funny!) right next door to Goldblatt's delicatessen. The Israeli-Palestinian conflict is coming head to head - or more like parking lot to adjacent parking lot. Larry is unphased by the rooted rivalry for two reasons: one, the chicken is OUT OF THIS WORLD and two, there's a hot palestinian chick. Chicken and women - lethal combo. What will he choose? Move over Sophie, Larry has his choice to make.

Babydoll's "by the way"...
-Is it me or do all men after they've reached a certain age/career status gravitate towards khakis, polos, and freshly cut grass? What is it about golf, seriously? There's no women around (hardly), you can't drink while you play, and you have to walk A LOT. What's the fun in that?
-Maggie Wheeler, the woman we refer to as Janice ("Oh...my....god!") actually has a normal voice. I'm kind of disappointed. I used to imagine her as being legit nasal like Fran Drescher. I feel kind of cheated.
-Larry Miller is back after 10 Things I Hate About You (the movie AND the TV show, talk about pulling a "Cluless" am I right?). I strongly suggest that LD call up Wallace Shawn next.
-People NEED TO STOP SAYING "LOL". ROFLcopter is still acceptable.

Curb your political correctness
-"This would be a fantastic place for jews that are cheating on their spouses to come to"
-"Not only does this somebody not want you... doesn't even acknowledge your right to exist... wants your destruction... that's a turn on"
"I'm living under a mitzvahs... you have none of that"
-"I'm already committed to the rally on the other side of Goldblatt's at the german place"
-"What's not to like?" "Ehh..you're a jew" "EH!"
-"I look like I've got a kitty and we're making evil plans!"
- THE BOUQUET FINAL: "Fu** me you fu**ing jew... you zionist pig... you occupying fu**... I'm going to fu** the jew out of you... you want to fu** me like Israel fu**ed my country? Fu** me you jew bastard! You circumsized fu**!"
-"The penis doesn't care about race, creed, color...the penis wants to get to its' homeland...it wants to go home!"