09 October, 2012

Review -- CASTLE 5.03: 'Secret's Safe with Me'

After last week's episode got HGF and some of the readers excited about 'Castle' again, I'm concerned this week's installment will have the reverse effect.

Take that back, I don't care what you people think, just that you read the review and maybe post a comment so it looks like people care what I think.

And while I didn't think there was anything terribly wrong about the episode, it didn't really generate much emotion or feelings in me to talk about here. Sure, there was a little fun and a little flirting, but there was some lame-ass shit in there that even got the pathetic-girly-sap that is yours truly, a bit annoyed.

I could have done without the Alexis storyline. How many times on how many shows do we need to see a kid go of to college a bit scared to be on their own? If I want to see that storyline and I want to see how it's done, I'm going to watch 'Parenthood', not 'Castle'. Monsters under the bed? Really? I'd rather see what she's doing ON the bed in college, than what's lurking underneath. (Hey now!)

Even as a lover of all things sappy and romantic-y, even I couldn't stomach the lame-ness of Castle and Beckett in the precinct talking about kissing while shaking hands. I think I'm going to puke now.

Last thing before I finish talking about an episode that really provided me with nothing to talk about: I predict that Esposito and/or Ryan will figure out about Castle and Beckett in the next episode.


--CASTLE: "I'm a best-selling author, why wouldn't I have $2,000 in my pocket?"

--BECKETT: "Take your hand off your tool, Marco!"


--As predictable as it was that there was something hidden in that doll all along, it led to a fun moment when Castle broke two of them in a row while whats-her-face watched in horror.

--Some bad police-work/logic skills: If that dude knew/thought that a $4 million bracelet was in the storage unit, why would he only bid up to $2,500? Methinks he would have brought a few more dollars to ensure he has enough for the winning bid.

--Memo to all criminals when confronted by police: NEVER say something like "It's an interesting theory, detective, but you can't prove any of it" or "I'd like to see you prove it." THEY ALWAYS PROVE IT. Just watch 'Murder She Wrote', dude.

--I like how Castle noted that they brought justice to their family .... umm, what family? They are all dead.

THE SCORE: 59 out of 100


  1. I guess everyone thought castle sucked this week hence the no comments.

    I haven't been watching since the season 5 opener which i liked.

    One thing that never made sense to me is why have an Alexis goes off to college storyline when you still want the actress on the show.

    Why bother with it.

    1. My thoughts on that:

      1. With each new season of the show, they progressed her a grade in school. So with Season 4 came her high school graduation and Season 5 her first year of college. (I kinda hate how so many shows feel like since it's a new season, everyone has to progress a year in school. That's bullshit. So I'm guessing in New Yew York there can only be 22 or so murders per year, or something? Stupid, stupid, stupid)

      2. The first four seasons of the show displayed Alexis as being very smart, so it wasn't like they were going to have her not go to college. So being a complete bum and doing nothing wasn't an option, and taking a year off to travel isn't either (cause then she isn't around), so having her go to college is the only logical move.

      3. Since they have her going to a local college, she will still be around. Just probably not quite as much as before, which will probably save the show some money as well. It's all about the Benjamins, people.

      4. Where the hell is maryploppins? I write these reviews for you, damnit. The least you can do is comment!

  2. Hahaha holy crap 59/100, that is a little more harsh than I would be on this ep. I'd say like ... 70/100. It was aiight. There were a few good parts but it was ho-hum overall.

    "I could have done without the Alexis storyline. How many times on how many shows do we need to see a kid go off to college a bit scared to be on their own?" Oh god true, that storyline bored me to death. I've never been real into the Alexis storylines, but occasionally they are amusing enough to hold my interest. Not this time.

    "... even I couldn't stomach the lame-ness of Castle and Beckett in the precinct talking about kissing while shaking hands. I think I'm going to puke now." Hahaha!! I actually didn't mind this for some reason, and I HATE sappy stuff. This one didn't set off my lame/cheesy-alarms though, I could hang with it.

    The cases of the week are rarely all that interesting to me, but this one was especially boring. The sound problems on KGO are making it very difficult for me to just sit and enjoy this show now, so when the ep is a little ho-hum then it kinda multiplies the issue for me. Last week I was able to power through it because the ep was so entertaining. This week, not so much. I kept finding myself checking Twitter and stuff while it was on, which is not normally something I do during Castle.

    I did kinda like the story of that freaky stick man at the end though, even though it was pretty similar to most of Beckett's sad mom stories heheh.

  3. Oh, I'm so glad that you reviewed this episode, I really wanted to know what you think about it!
    OK, now that it looks like I care what you think (that's what you asked, right?) I can go to the uninteresting part (for you) and say what I think: I agree with your review, this was really one of the lamest and less interesting episodes, IMO. It sounded like one of those fill-in eps that they make when they run short of ideas, or before they are preparing for a major arc. But this is only the third episode of the season, isn't it a little too early?
    And for me, the best line was Castle talking with Martha about "that" speech with Alexis: "Oh, yeah, we had it a long time ago! I've learned so many things that day..." :)