04 November, 2011

CHUCK Vs. the Bearded Bandit - 5.02: Kung Fu Chaos

The 80th new showing of a CHUCK episode was achieved tonight and you want to know what I thought of it. Why else would you be here?

First, let me just say that reaching 80 episodes is impressive for any show. It is especially impressive for a show that was nearly cancelled after 13, then 35, then 54, then 78 episodes. So, congratulations to everyone involved. And by everyone involved I mean the people who make the show and those who negotiated for the show's return. Not the delusional fans who think they saved it via the Internet.

Now, onto the review!

The episode opens up with Chuck, Sarah, and Casey doing a presentation at some spy conference, for Carmichael Industries. It doesn't go well. Then the competition shows up and looks like a bunch of super duper kick-ass spies! The leader of the group is Neo's girlfriend, Gertrude. She is also a former antagonist of Casey's.

Chuck: Go ahead, who is she?
Casey: One of the KGB's most ruthless spies, 'til the fall of the Soviet Union (spits). Then she went into the private security game.
Sarah: And how do you know her?
Casey: Minsk, 1995. I was being a patriot. She was being whatever she was paid to be.
Chuck: (amused) Wow, 1995. I was still in middle school. (realizes Casey is not amused)
Casey: Anyway, we had an altercation. I ended up with a Roswell blade in my shoulder. It made a nasty scar right over one of my favorite scars.

Meanwhile the Buy More, the only real source of income for Carmichael Industries, is down to tumbleweeds, literally, and Morgan just wants to out his super powers to the world like Troy would on COMMUNITY were he Superman. Suddenly, because this happens all the time in the realzies world, some dude named Karl walks into the BM and Morgan flashes, err, zooms on him. Fearing he is coming to kill them, Morgan attacks like a psychotic ninja and knocks the dude out. Soon after, they realize the "bad guy" is a client. Dundundun!

When the client produces a box as evidence of a kidnapping, no one seems eager to open it.
Chuck: We gonna draw straws to see who opens it?
Sarah finally does and reveals a severed finger.
Sarah: Oh!
Chuck: Oh my god. Oh my g.. that's not even on ice. I don't, that's probably not going to be able to be reattached.

The mission: Karl's brother was kidnapped, finger cut off to prove it, and the team must save him.
The value: $200,000 up front, and another $200,000 upon delivery of said brother.
The problem: Morgan is a loose cannon and needs a handler.
The solution: Chuck, the former Intersect, becomes Morgan's handler.

While Chuck and Morgan are having their discussion about the whole handler issue, Big Mike barges in, having just arrived from his honeymoon.
Big Mike: (pointing at Morgan) Hello, stepchild! Like my new threads? I just got back from four weeks of sexual experimentation (Morgan recoils in horror) and snorkeling with my new wife in Hawaii. Whatcha boys been up to? The Buy More seems.. empty. We observing International Pancake Day?

Secondary mission: The Buy More needs to increase business.
The solution: Record a new commercial.

Meanwhile, Verbanski Corp thumbs its nose at Carmichael Industries, pissing off Sarah.

Gertrude calls Sarah and asks her to meet with her. Upon arrival, Sarah is offered a job along with an explanation of the massiveness of the competition. Sarah acts unimpressed.
Gertrude: And what does Carmichael Industries have other than a former colonel and a CEO with skinny arms?

As their conversation ends and Sarah leaves, she pauses, looks at Gertrude's collected trophies and makes a declaration.
Sarah: Oh, by the way, when this whole thing ends, don't expect me to mount anything of yours in my office. It's just tacky.

Meanwhile take two, Chuck and Morgan just happen to be inside a convenience store while it is getting robbed. Holy chances of that happening, Batman! Morgan goes all bearded-bandit crazy, with mask, gruff voice, badass attitude and all.

When Morgan's attempt to disarm the bad guy is only partly successful, Chuck has to save the day. I had to rewind this sequence, if only for the hilarity of Chuck trying to rub the fingerprints off the shotgun. Actually, I really liked this sequence and for the first time liked Morgan as the enthusiastic Intersect trying to be handled by Chuck (that's what she said?).

When the convenience store issue becomes public, the team decides Morgan has to be put on the bench for a bit. Morgan isn't happy about it but Chuck emphasizes his need to protect him. I am a sucker for these type of scenes. It is part of why I fell in love with the show. The shift from hilarious comedy, to family drama, back to comedy, and then action. I'm in love!

Meanwhile triple time, the BM crew tries to create a commercial for the store but things just aren't going well.... until Captain Awesome walks in, exaggerated slow motion hair blast and all. And Big Mike has an idea!

Meanwhile part four, Carmichael Industries climb the side of a mountain or something to get into the compound of the bad guys. Hey, why am I typing all this stuff? You watched the episode right? I mean, why would you be reading a review for an episode you DIDN'T watch?

To sum up: Morgan is pissy about being in the van. Decides not to stay in the van. Saves the day. I am shocked yet again to actually enjoy Morgan as the Intersect in this sequence. By not showing him try to kick the asses of half a dozen trained security guards, and by injecting some humor into it, the whole thing works. I am getting worried. Am I starting to like Morgan as the Intersect? OH NO!

The team discovers Karl wants to kill his brother. They decide to turn the tables on him and protect the finger-missing bro. Casey and the Intersect clash.

Captain Awesome gets a job offer from Big Mike to do a commercial for the store (I thought Chuck was the secret owner of the BM, so why does Big Mike know?).

Captain Awesome: Sure I did some modeling for Abercrombie & Fitch back in college, but I hung up those cargo pants a long time ago.
Big Mike: Hold on, son! I'm not talking about doing some teenage porno here!

Morgan and Chuck discuss who is handling what or whom. Then Morgan makes an executive decision to take on the bad guys with Chuck. Chuck tries to reason with him, explaining he understands how the Intersect makes you feel like you can do anything.

Morgan: Here's the thing though, Chuck. You don't need the Intersect to feel that way, OK? With or without it, you are a hero! So don't call them! Alright? We can handle this, together. Just come with me. I need you.

Before going to their doom, Chuck calls on Sarah and Casey to help.

Yep, I am a sucker all over again because I love this stuff.

AND THEN THEY HAVE MORGAN FIGHT without any cute tricks and I am right back to the first episode where he looked RIDICULOUS! Arrghhh! There is that stuntman that looks nothing like Josh Gomez again. Yay!

Meanwhile five, we find out Casey and Gertrude have had sexy time before. Also, Chuck and Morgan get to kick ass together. It is actually fun watching Chuck kick ass WITHOUT the Intersect.

But when Morgan takes out a bad guy using an iconic Indiana Jones move, and Chuck calls attention to it, Morgan doesn't seem to have any clue what he is talking about... RUH ROH! Something is wrong! And after an argument, they get captured (obviously, why else would Casey and Sarah be on the way?).

But who saves the day? The Verbanski Corp! Yay! I am digging this Gertrude chick.

Gertrude: You know, some might say it's tacky hiring your competition to help you, but I, I think it takes balls. Oh and I'll have someone from our Burbank office drop off your bill. We don't have a payment plan.

Meanwhile sexy, Captain Awesome has delivered a superb performance for the Buy More commercial. But Carmichael Industries is still hurting financially.

Meanwhile seven, Chuck and Morgan have a classic end-of-episode CHUCK talk about the future of Morgan as the Intersect. But something else is wrong... he doesn't seem to care about Star Wars!

FINAL MEANWHILE, Chuck is actually exercising! Chuck and Sarah share a lame kiss. Casey works up the nerve to ask Gertrude out. Morgan sells himself as the Intersect to Verbanski... TRAITOR!!!!

Other quotables!

Chuck tells his brother-in-law that the presentation didn't go well.
Captain Awesome: What do you mean it didn't go well?! Did you give equal eye contact to all four quadrants of the audience?!
Chuck: It was, it was great. All of your advice was great.
Captain Awesome: Of course it was. It was the same tactics I used to woo your hot sister.

After Morgan ninja knocks out the client.
Morgan: Someone just found out that the zoom is mightier than the sword, my friend!

While trying to shoot the Buy More commercial, Lester attempts to sing.
Big Mike: Man, I am so over this whole Jeffster thing.
Lester: Me too.

When Morgan is relegated to the van while on a mission, he isn't happy and has a private conversation with himself about it, mockingly speaking for the others.
Morgan: Wait in the van, Morgan. Yeah, wait in the van. Oh, oh in the van, moron! Huh! Grunt, grunt!

Casey explains his attraction to Gertrude.
Casey: You ever have sex with someone who just tried to kill ya?
Sarah: (whispering) Oh god.
Casey: It's incredible.
Sarah: OK, I think we should focus on the mission now.

If I had to rate this episode, I would have to give it:

92 out of 100.

While some people are already whining like little babies about how annoying Morgan was (and he certainly was), I felt it served the story well and set up the next episode perfectly. Something is going on with the bearded guy and it isn't just his usual idiocy. The production values were very good, again, and we got a decent amount of Buy More with a dash of Captain Awesome. Also, the introduction of Gertrude was handled and performed well. I am excited to see where they take her character (it is always nice to see a real actor play the antagonist female role).  It loses a point for the creators of the show not realizing how ridiculous it looks every time Morgan's action sequence is performed by Josh's stuntman.